Two skirts, two shirts, one sweater and a pair of jeans: $200. Lunch for a group of hungry holiday shoppers: $75. Five gal pals with 135 combined years of friendship sharing an afternoon together: priceless.That's the value researchers say female camaraderie brings to the lives of women.

"I love my friends, and I wouldn't give anything for them," says Leola Hatcher, 51, who met Debora Bowers in second grade at Whitefoord Elementary School in Atlanta's Kirkwood area. The twosome became a threesome during middle school, when they united with Lisa Harris. Lisa and Leola ran track and played basketball. Debora cheered.

In 1978, Leola (her friends call her Lynne) was introduced to Kim Abnatha by the men in their lives. The women's friendship thrived; the romances did not.

Later, Leola met Sharon Little while working part time as a ball girl for the Braves, and they became roommates. (Sharon is still affectionately known as "Roomie.")

"You become a family," says Debora, 51, of the women who talk almost daily and attend concerts, plays, theater and movies together. "You feel like blood relatives."

Research suggests that female companionship may be more important than kinship. Friendship is not only good for the soul but also good for the body. A UCLA study on women and stress found that talking with friends produces a calming effect that counters stress. Such social ties help lower blood pressure, heart rate and cholesterol, thereby reducing risk of disease.

So, the more gal pals a woman has, the happier and healthier she is, according to the Nurses' Health Study from Harvard Medical School. Not having close friends, the study suggested, might be as harmful to a woman's health as smoking or excess weight.

Friendship offers emotional support and nurturing that women may not get from other relationships, said Janis Overrocker, a clinical psychologist.

Women with friends have more balanced lives and better mental health, she said. "Women who know how to tap into that wellspring have more to give to their primary relationships."

As women age, they tend to need and value friendships more because of the additional pressures they face, but maintaining friendships amid increasing demands can be quite difficult.

"Friendships take work," says Beverly Guy Sheftall, director of the Women's Research and Resource Center at Spelman College. It begins with mutual caring and respect, coupled with open and honest communication.

"They don't just happen, you have to tend to them," she says.

Men and children

When all members of a ya-ya sisterhood are single, it's easy for everyone to spend time together. But as women marry, and time is limited, female fellowship may get pushed aside.

"It's always a mistake when women focus on their husbands and children without developing friendships," says Guy-Sheftall of the struggle to balance. "You've got to renegotiate the friendship, or it can become strained."

For Debora, the first of the group to tie the knot, marriage didn't change the sisterhood. The initial friendships were established during childhood, so they became a non-negotiable extension of the marriage, she says.

Still, the friends are careful to maintain a delicate balance between their male and female partnerships.

"We are smart enough to realize that when we are in a relationship, we have to give the men the respect of who they are in our lives," says Debora of her husband of 35 years, who supports the sisterhood.

Kim agrees and says the shared experiences of marriage and motherhood further unite the women but also create relational boundaries.

"We respect each other's lives and husbands and when someone needs their space," says Kim, 49, married 21 years.

In sickness and health

"Even if you have a husband or children, it doesn't mean you don't need your friends," says Spelman's Guy-Sheftall.

That was especially true for Leola, who was diagnosed with breast cancer in 1989. The following day, she broke the news to her friends.

When Leola explained her condition, treatment and recovery process,"I wanted to cry with her, but she wasn't crying at that point," says Lisa, 51. "Sometimes you've got to know when not to have an opinion and to just be supportive."

The prospect of losing Leola became a defining moment in the quintet's quasi-sorority. Her diagnosis represented the first real threat to their alliance.

"We all made sure that she was OK," says Sharon, 48, referring to the near round-the-clock care they provided. "We almost lived there."

"They surrounded me with their love," the breast cancer survivor says.

What once threatened to alter the sisterhood ultimately strengthened their bond. The women advocate for breast cancer research and participate in education campaigns and fund-raising activities such as walks, runs and fashion shows.

In January, the 17-year survivor will celebrate another year of life, love and health.

And another year of friendship. Buddy System Making friends isn't always easy. Keeping them can be even harder. Try these tips.

• Volunteer. You can meet people with similar interests.
• Make friends at work. Business associates can become friends, too.
• Be fair and reasonable. Don't expect more than you're willing to give.
• Make it a priority. Work it into your schedule.
• Communicate. Call, send an e-mail. Reach out in some way.
• Embrace differences. Value and respect different opinions and interests.
• Send an occasional card. Don't wait for a special occasion.
• Exercise together. Meet at the gym, or walk in the park.
• Send pictures. If you don't get together often, update your friends with photos.
• Go to lunch. You've got to eat; invite a friend.
• Organize. Form a book club or other group that brings you together regularly.
• Make it a family affair. Include spouses and children.
• Get away. Plan a trip with friends to spend some time together.
• Create a circle journal. Keep your friends abreast of what's going on in your life. You can mail it to friends or use e-mail.

Source: http://www.ajc.com/living/content/living/stories/2007/01/02/0102lvFRIENDS.html